Understand
by naturally morbid
Summary: One-shot. Abel x Esther. 'To confess his love when it was more than likely false, just like everything about him, save his allegiance to the Orden? Abel simply did not understand.'


Author's Note: Alright, an Abel x Esther. I've been hitting the Beatles pretty hard lately, thanks to Across the Universe. Seriously, watch it. Anyway, the lyrics from the song "While my guitar gently weeps" are in _italics. _So enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Trinity Blood, nor do I own the Beatles or their song "While my guitar gently weeps."

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Understand

_I don't know how someone controlled you..._

"No Dietrich! No!" Esther cried out as she tried to stop the gun from firing into Abel's shoulder. It was like a broken reel playing in her head. The same torturous film playing every time she shut her eyes.

She tried to shake the gun from her hand but it would not leave. Dietrich's cruel laugh rang in her ears, she could see his devilish smile as he watched. She wished it would all end soon, that she would just pull the gun on herself rather than on the father. He didn't deserve this.

"Sister Esther?" Abel asked his travel companion as she convulsed and cried in her sleep. He touched her shoulder to wake her, but she screamed and struck him hard across the face.

"No!" she screamed again, as she fell from the nightmare into the realms of reality. She found herself staring at the shocked and reddened face of Father Nightroad.

"Sister Esther?" he asked.

"I'm so sorry Father. I was having a nightmare I guess," she shook her head as she reached out to touch the skin on his face. "Are you okay?"

"Yes Miss Esther, I'm fine. It was an accident after all. I think I should ask you the same thing though. You were really crying out there," Abel told her, his concern showing through more than he was aware of.

"Oh that? It was just a simple nightmare," Esther deflected. "Nothing to be concerned with," she smiled bravely. She shut her eyes again, trying to get some sleep on their way back to Rome.

Abel watched his companion sleep. Her ruby locks fell into her closed eyes. He could not ignore that she cried out about Dietrich.

How could someone have been as cold hearted as he? To gain Esther's trust and then crash it back on her with his unspeakable act? To hurt the beautiful young woman as he had? How could he do such a thing?

How could he manipulate and control her as he had? To confess his love when it was more than likely false, just like everything about him, save his allegiance to the Orden? Abel simply did not understand.

He touched her face gently, pushing some of the locks from her eyes. She leaned against his shoulder and he could not help but smile at her innocence.

_They bought and sold you..._

All Esther had been to Dietrich was extra business. It had not been hard for him to throw her in the deal with the Marquis of Hungary. She was just tossed from deal to deal like a doll.

Abel wished that he could stop the nightmares. It was over, it had been over for months now, but still it plagued her. He noticed that she seemed to be losing sleep lately. He touched her face again.

He wished that he could end her suffering. He wished that she would just notice him, notice that she was perfect for him, notice that he was perfect for her. He had not felt this way about anyone since Lilith. She was not Lilith, she was different of course, but he was reminded of her.

The girl woke up and gazed up at him. "Father?" she asked.

"Hm?" His fingers were resting on her cheek. "Oh," he blushed, removing his hand.

"No, leave it there," the young nun said sleepily as she curled close, falling back asleep instantly. Abel smiled and shut his own eyes, resting his head on hers.

_With every mistake we must surely be learning..._

He did not understand what compelled humans to harm and use one another; more like what could motivate someone to harm and use Esther for their own dubious purposes.

He would never use Esther. He could not promise about harm though. Harm seemed to plague the father's life. Anyone he grew attached to either died or left him.

He never wanted anything to happen to her though. He would do his best to protect her all the days of his long life.

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Author's End Note: So, let me know if you liked this or I should hit the writing board again. 


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